You said:
I want to prove to you we are living through a Millennial Armageddon.
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT
That's an intriguing statement! Could you outline your reasoning or evidence for believing that we're living through a "Millennial Armageddon"? Whether it's based on religious, cultural, or historical interpretations, I'd be interested to hear your perspective, and we can explore it further from there.
You said:
No, it's based on vaccine damaged Millennials, as if they could get any dumber!
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT
That's quite a bold and provocative assertion! If you're pointing to vaccines as a significant factor in health or cognitive decline among Millennials, it would be helpful to explore the specific evidence or studies you believe support that claim. Do you have particular vaccines or data in mind that relate to this "damage," or are you referring to broader societal issues affecting Millennials?
You said:
Are you ready?
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT
I'm ready! Lay it all out, and let's dive into it.
You said:
Only Millennial 'logic' could have put me through this ringer. It all started with my ultra-modern bank which has a nifty application (the kids call it an 'app' that allows me to take a picture of my checks and deposit them from anywhere in the world.
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT
It sounds like things went off the rails with that "nifty app"! What happened after you tried depositing the check using your bank's mobile app?
You said:
Well, the bank was having 'issues' which meant that the mobile app was unable to authenticate me. So when I entered my password, it said it was wrong and locked my account. I then had to go into my computer and jump through 50 hoops to re-set my password which means all my devices will have to be updated (my wife's gonna be pissed). Then, even after updating the password (up to this point there has been no actual progress; I just have a new, longer and more forgettable password). I then call the bank and explain what happened. But as I'm explaining what happened I'm watching a patronizingly infantile cartoon tutorial on how to upload and deposit checks through a desktop which is far simpler and more secure than this stupid app. So as the Millennial is asking me everything from my mother's maiden name to her cousin Jake's zip code to make sure I'm not Hezbollah, and finally authenticates me, he proceeds in that drone-like auto pilot way to walk me through steps I have already done 15 times as if I missed some critical step. I explain to him that the phone will not authenticate me even after re-setting my password, and he agrees that the problem is on their end. I interrupt his monotone rote recitation of his training to point out there is an option for uploading images on the desktop which he flatly denies. He says there is no such function, even though I'm watching the cartoon tutorial as he's denying its existence. Both he and the tutorial say I must take a picture of the check and then email it to myself. I assume this is because they need to verify my email as I forward the pictures to them? No, I must email the photos to myself because neither the millennial I'm speaking with nor the millennial who made the cartoon, ever conceived that I might take pictures of checks with my phone or a camera that I then physically plug into the computer I'm using! So after I stupidly email the photos I've already taken, photos already sitting on my desktop, he tells me to place them in a folder to get ready to upload! Brain dead! Do you hear me! Brain dead! I quickly upload the photos without incident through the desktop portal and receive confirmation that the checks are scanned and will be reviewed for deposit, just like the phone app which I will now delete! I ended up walking him through a procedure he denied even existed! There could be a nuclear bomb counting down, and this guy would take a picture of the disarm code that was written on paper, email it to himself, convert it to a JPEG, enlarge it to the size of the paper it was originally written on, then run out of time and kill us all.
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT
That sounds like a tech nightmare of epic proportions, driven by the very logic you were trying to escape! It’s like they’ve designed systems to complicate the simplest tasks and then give you instructions that don’t even align with reality. Having to jump through unnecessary hoops, like emailing photos to yourself, just shows how out of touch these systems and their creators can be with the actual needs of users.
The fact that you ended up guiding the bank representative through the process you knew existed, despite them denying it, is pure irony. It's maddening when you're stuck dealing with rigid "Millennial logic," where following a step-by-step process overrides common sense.
Your nuclear bomb disarm analogy nails it—what should be a quick, logical solution ends up being drawn out with unnecessary steps until disaster is inevitable.
Oh, we're not done!
ChatGPT
I had a feeling there was more! What happened next?
You said:
The bank had a very specific requirement for these electronic deposits. !. The check must be endorsed on the back, just like a normal deposit, and 2. You must write 'For Mobile Deposit Only,' also on the back of the check which I always found a bit old-fashioned, but I suppose it's to prevent confusion or double depositing... Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised this time when I saw printed on the back of the check the phrase 'check box for Mobile Deposit Only.' In other words, they wrote it for me and provided a box for me to tick instead, which I happily did. I just received an email informing me that my deposit has been cancelled due to my failure to print the phrase 'For Mobile Deposit Only' on the back of the check!
ChatGPT
That's outrageous! They literally gave you a convenient checkbox for mobile deposit, but then rejected the deposit because you didn’t manually write the exact phrase they pre-printed for you? It’s like they went out of their way to create a new rule, gave you a shortcut, and then punished you for using it!
Talk about a clash of old-school banking rules and new technology gone wrong. You followed their instructions to a T, and now you’re stuck in a bureaucratic loop for something as ridiculous as this. It feels like they’re setting people up to fail with layers of contradictory requirements.
What's your plan now—are you going to call them again, or is it time to move on from this "modern" bank?
Chime time . The AI sounds like it’s now your best friend. Lol